# So sad...



## PACE (Oct 8, 2007)

My grandfather is dying... I just visited him. He was asleep when I went into his room, and I just sat next to him by myself for a while. Then my mom came in and I just started crying. He has cancer and had brain surgery a few months back and then chemo and radiation. He was doing good until a few weeks ago. Now he can't get out of bed and looks so sad. I hadn't seen him since about two weeks ago when he was sitting in the backyard shucking corn. I helped him and we talked about my goats. I am so sad right now. I can't stop crying and it was a shock to see him asleep in bed like he was. He didn't wake up while he was there but it was like saying goodbye, just being there. I gave him a kiss on the cheek before I left. There are lots of people at the house. Family and friends. He is old and has been independent and active for his whole life. He had a great life and isn't suffering, which we are all greatful for. He has done so much in his life and is now surrounded by people that love him... but it doesn't make it any less hard to say goodbye. I just had to get it off my chest. It's really tough when someone you have loved all your life who has lived next door and taught you so much isn't well anymore. It is just his time.... But still... anyway, just writing that out has made me feel a little more composed. I'm going to go back tomorrow I hope. I want to see him awake to tell him I love him.


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## Shelly (Oct 5, 2007)

Pace, 
I'm so sorry I know how you feel my Grandfather pass away in march. It was such a big shock to see him in the hospital. He had always been very active in family and community activities. Prayers for you and your family. Shelly


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## GSFarm (Oct 6, 2007)

I'm so sorry! Prayers are coming your way. 

I don't understand what you're going through since I've never had a grandpa, but I can imagine it's very rough.


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## getchagoat (Julie) (Oct 5, 2007)

Emily,
I'm sorry you are having to go through this, but it shows what a neat relationship you have with your grandfather. Alot of kids now don't have that. I was never close with my grandfathers. You are very blessed.


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## StaceyRosado (Oct 5, 2007)

been there - done that - got the T-shirt - sure isn't fun!  

I have no words to say for you because no words help. I am glad you did write out what you were feeling and it helped you - doing that always helps me too. ((((hugs))))) for you


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## cute kids (Oct 5, 2007)

emily,
i am so sorry you are loosing your grandfather. what a wonderful relationship you two have shared. you will cherish that forever.
please DO tell him you love him, even if he is not awake. people loose their hearing last, and he very well might hear you even if you think he isn't listening. and you will know you told him. he loves you, too, i am sure.


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## K-Ro (Oct 14, 2007)

{{HUGS}} to you sweety. This is a very hard thing to go through. You are very lucky to have memories that will last you a lifetime. I will keep you and your family in my prayers. Even if he isn't awake you can tell him you love him and anything else you want, it is amazing what people hear when you think they can't.


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## alyssa_romine (Oct 5, 2007)

I am so sorry to hear that. Prayers are coming your way.


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## enjoytheride (Oct 5, 2007)

It is so sad to lose someone who means that much to you but I think you will find, that if you know him well, he will always be there with you. I hope your sadness is helped with remembering good times with him.


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## cornishwlr (Oct 19, 2007)

I know what you are going through. Even though it has been almost 23 years when my papa past. I was glad that I got the chance to tell him good bye and to say a prayer for him. He saved our lives when I was 6 months old. He made my mom leave for a hurricane 50 years ago. She was going to stay. The town was wiped out but we survived. We lived next to them for 5 years after that. He helped my dad build the house that we lived in. By the way he was my step grandpa. He married my grandma when my dad was 8. He helped to raise my dad as his own. He loved us as his own. As we loved him and still have lots of good memories of such a great man. So take comfort in the thought that that his memory will always be with you.


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## trob1 (Oct 5, 2007)

I just lost my grandfather about a month ago and I feel your pain. Tell him you love him now, he doesnt need to be awake to hear and feel your love. Big hugs from TN coming your way.


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## sweetgoats (Oct 18, 2007)

I am so sorry. My prayers are with you. I will will be praying for your family. Hugs to you all.


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## goathappy (Oct 5, 2007)

We are coming up on the one year aniversary of my grandpa's death(mom's dad) , and the 14th anniversary of my other grandpa's death(dad's dad, I was a baby when he died and never got to know him)
My grandpa that died last year, he was battling leukemia, it was very painful for him and we were all relieved when he passed but we were all very saddened still. When it is time to let go say your good byes and always remember him and never let the good memories go. He hears you and loves you even though it may not seem like it right now.
**HUGS**


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## goat fever (Oct 18, 2007)

Emily,

I am sorry you are going through this. I am lifting your entire family up in prayer. I am glad you have had a close relationship with your grandfather. Mine died when I was very young. I don't remember anything about them.


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## fritzie (Oct 6, 2007)

Emily prayers & hugs to you sweetie. i lost my husband three years ago also my mom & dad so i know how much you are hurting. talk to him & he will hear you. just remember that he will always be with you in your heart.


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## PACE (Oct 8, 2007)

He died this morning at around 1:00  

My dad and some others who were very close to him were with him and he went peacefully.

Thanks everyone so much for the kind words and thoughts... it really means a lot.

Everyone here is very sad. It's so hard to beieve that someone you have known for your whole life and loved is gone. I will sure remember him for what he was before he got sick and I'm sure I'll be very sad for quite some time. The goats can tell I'm not my usual self. They have been extra snuggly and gentle with me today. I guess there's nothing else to say, but it does help a little to write about it


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## alyssa_romine (Oct 5, 2007)

I am so sorry. He is in a better place and you will be reunited with him someday. ((((HUGS))))


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## Hailee's Herd (Oct 5, 2007)

Emily, so sorry to hear about your grandpa.


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## enjoytheride (Oct 5, 2007)

It's hard- I'm so sorry.


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## StaceyRosado (Oct 5, 2007)

((((Hugs))))) girl!


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## cute kids (Oct 5, 2007)

i am so sorry. you are both so lucky to have had one another. keep those good memories with you always. and let your goats help you; they do know things and can be a great comfort.


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## goathappy (Oct 5, 2007)

***hugs*** May God bless your family during this hard time.
It's so hard and I think about my grandpa every day. It was so hard when he died it was like somebody punched me really hard. I couldn't accept it and I didn't cry until his visitation and then I just couldn't stop crying.
When somebody you love is in pain and suffering it is a relief to know that they are in a better place and they suffer no more.
***HUGS***


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## cornishwlr (Oct 19, 2007)

So sorry to hear that he has died. It sounds like he had a long and good life. When my grandparents died I tried to remember all of the good times that we had together. At first I would cry almost everyday. Then the memories started to make me feel better knowing that I had all of these wonderful memories of them as I was growing up. It will be hard at first. But as time goes on it will get easier.


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## fritzie (Oct 6, 2007)

oh sweetie i am sooo sorry to hear that. but he is in a better place now. hold on to all the great times you had togeather. our goats can be so much comfort at a time like this.they do know


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## Dover Farms (Oct 16, 2007)

Emily,

I am so sorry about your Grandpa! I went through this kind of situation just about a month ago. Joan, a sweet old lady at our Church that was like another Grandma to me, passed away from cancer. I am glad that I went and seen her before she passed.

Again, I am sorry. My the Lord be with you and your family. Prayers coming your way.


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## sweetgoats (Oct 18, 2007)

Emily,
I am so sorry to hear about your grandfathers. I hope you know he did know that you were with him just sitting and being with him. I know he felt your presence, and he loved the time it was just the two of you.
I just hope you hang on to those memories that you have of him. Do not stop talking to him, he is there with you and always will be. Hugs to the family and i will pray that the Lord will comfort you all in these hard times. He is ans always will be with you all.


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## PACE (Oct 8, 2007)

Thanks so much everyone! I am still very sad, but I'm getting a little better. I think it was worse seeing him so sick. My parents had been seeing him every day and were telling me about him, but I never realized that he was going to die, like really face the fact, until I saw him that last time and I just broke down completely. Now he isn't suffering at all anymore, and we can remember him as he was. There are so many people who loved him and everyone is just being so kind and comforting. There was an article about him on the front page of the newspaper talking about all he did. He was a great conservationist and loved nature. He did so much good with his life and so many people recognize and miss him terribly. He started a tree service business, in the 50's I think, and my dad took it over and was his partner for years. He worked right up until a few months ago, looking at tree work and offering advice. So many of his customers are writing and sending donations in his name to an arborist organization... or something like that. I remember he always gave me a hug when he saw me and called my sister, cousin, and me (his grandchildren) his little darlings. He also loved birdwatching. He loved this time of year and went hiking every weekend and walking in the park every day. He always got up before the sun. His memorial service is on Thursday, and there's going to be tons of people there. It will be fairly informal and short, in the park that he loved, which is what he wanted. I am still really, really sad, but remembering all he did and what a long eventful, healthy life he had is comforting. Thanks again everyone for all your support. It means a lot.


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## goatnutty (Oct 9, 2007)

I'm so sorry I know what your going through I've lost 2grandmothers and my aunt in the past year.It is hard but you know it better than for him to suffer.


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