# Dad Joke Battle



## MyGoatsAreWeirdDogs13 (Jan 14, 2021)

You read the title. Here's the rules.

Post a good dad joke. Whoever gets the most likes by the end of March wins.

The Dad Joke Battle begins...

























NOW!


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## KST Goat Farm (Jul 29, 2019)

When does a joke become a dad joke? 


When it becomes apparent.


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## mariella (Feb 23, 2017)

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom?

Because the P is silent!


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## MellonFriend (Aug 8, 2017)

Why can't a nose be twelve inches long?

Because it would be a foot.


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## Iluvlilly! (Apr 6, 2019)

Why don't crabs give to charity?

Because they're shellfish.


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## happybleats (Sep 12, 2010)

What does a vegetarian cannibal eat? 

The "palms" of your hands and "plants" of your feet


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## Boers4ever (Jun 28, 2020)

Why don’t eggs tell jokes? 
They’d crack each other up.


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## Kass (Apr 26, 2020)

Why are baby ants always confused? 

Because thier uncles are Ants!


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## JML Farms (Jan 1, 2021)

Why did the burglar take a bath?

Because he wanted to make a clean get away!


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## alwaystj9 (Apr 10, 2019)

Why do baby ducks walk softly/ Because they can't walk hardly.


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## mariella (Feb 23, 2017)

Why does a Dairy mans stool only have 3 legs?

Because the goat has the udder!

It's better if you say it with a Minnesota accent


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## wheel-bear-o (Jul 6, 2020)

What do you call a fish with no eyes? 

Fsh


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## Tanya (Mar 31, 2020)

What is Natchos Cheese?

Its not your cheese....


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## MyGoatsAreWeirdDogs13 (Jan 14, 2021)

Keep those jokes coming, you have less than a month to get more likes!

Also, I forgot to mention, you can post multiple jokes. Whoever gets the most likes total wins...

I don't know what you could win. How about a crisp virtual high five?


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## MellonFriend (Aug 8, 2017)

Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, "Do you know how to drive this thing?". (rofl)


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## mariella (Feb 23, 2017)

So a conversation that happened between my sister and I during kidding season.
Me: hay watch Luna while I'm at work. I don't think she's close but you know her.
Me: leaves and is gone for 1 hour!
My sister: calls me, Hay so I think Luna's in labor.
Me: you have got to be kidding!
Her: no Luna is
Silents for a few seconds.
Me: I hate you both...

Sorry it's not a dad joke but she likes to bring it up from time to time.


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## maplebrooknigerian (Jan 23, 2021)

We have a resident opossum. His name is Stimpy. Saw him running haphazardly through the field the other night. Pulled up the Mission Impossible theme, called my husband over.
"Hey look, it's Mission ImPOSSUMBLE".
He did not laugh


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## Iluvlilly! (Apr 6, 2019)

Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon?
Great food, no atmosphere!


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## toth boer goats (Jul 20, 2008)

:haha:


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## MellonFriend (Aug 8, 2017)

So, @mariella wins right? 🎇🎉🎆


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## JML Farms (Jan 1, 2021)

I know this is an old post, but I just heard this and thought I'd share it.
What does a mermaid was her fins with?
Tide🤣


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## Goatastic43 (Jun 11, 2021)

I would share a vegetable joke, but it’s too corny....


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## Tanya (Mar 31, 2020)

Why did the chicken cross the road? ......................................................................................
To test your breaks and give the others a chance to follow......


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## mariella (Feb 23, 2017)

Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get too the Idiot's house.

Nock nock.
Who's there.
The chicken.


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## Tanya (Mar 31, 2020)

Dad, Dad, kiss my finger..... ok my sweety.... _kisses finger_..... No dad, that is the wrong one.... you ate my booger......


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## toth boer goats (Jul 20, 2008)

😷


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## Tanya (Mar 31, 2020)

How do you know that elephants like to travel? They carry their trunks with them


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## Tanya (Mar 31, 2020)

What do Santa's little helpers learn at school?
The ELFabet


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## Tanya (Mar 31, 2020)

What music artist does santa listen to???

Elfis Prestley


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## Tanya (Mar 31, 2020)

What do you call a labrador that starts learning magic???

An Abracadabrador


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## MyGoatsAreWeirdDogs13 (Jan 14, 2021)

Well, I'm about 4 months late to get the winner. I'll count likes ASAP and tell the winner


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## MyGoatsAreWeirdDogs13 (Jan 14, 2021)

@KST Goat Farm and @Boers4ever are tied for the win, both with 10 likes!

You each get... Not only a high five... But a CRISP high five for your prize! 🙏🙏

I can't tell if that's a praying emoji or high five emoji... Just say it's a high five.


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