# I'm Done.



## Duchesse (Oct 31, 2007)

I am *DONE*. Winky, my 3 month old doe died. It is time for me to face some HARSH realities. *I am* not able to do this anymore. Winky's death speaks to MY management. I thought I only needed help from my husband but, in reality he's getting help from me.He already has his hands full. We also raise toy poodles. I have 7 dogs. We are both up in age me 57yo with a heart condition and him 66yo with hypertension (high blood pressure). So I now see that we are not able and most of the work was falling on him and these are my goats.

SO, I've decided to disperse my whole herd. It's only 6 goats now. 4 does, 1 buck, and 1 wether. I've decided to do this for them. Obviously something is very wrong. I've lost 4 goats in less than 6 months. First JoJo died. Hannah lost a buckling because she was too young to get pregnant. Bonnie had two kids and the buck died within 24 hours. I bottle fed Winky for 10 weeks and now she's gone. Again this speaks to *MY* management. So it is time to seek a good home for them.

I hope that no one judges me to harshly.:imsorry: I really did try. I feel absolutely terrible.:upset: I want to :hide: I'm (embarrassed). I thought I could handle this but I'm not able anymore. I :inlove: my animals to much to see them suffer. This is the right thing to do.:nod:


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## ksalvagno (Oct 6, 2009)

I give you credit for being honest with yourself. Don't feel bad. We have all taken up something and realized we really can't do it. Good luck with getting your herd sold.


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## CaramelKittey (Oct 31, 2019)

I'm sorry to hear that. It has happened to all of us, and sometimes there just isn't much we can do. I hope you find great homes for your goats.
@Sfgwife Are you out in that area? 
Do you know anybody?


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## toth boer goats (Jul 20, 2008)

I am so sorry, sometimes it doesn't go well with any kind of livestock. 

All of us experience things like this, some hold on and try again, then succeed. 

It is tough losing them, I know how you feel.


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## Goatzrule (Feb 7, 2013)

Its good that you are taking responsibility for this. So many animals suffer at the hands of people who are ignorant. 
Good luck


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## happybleats (Sep 12, 2010)

Awe..im sorry you lost Winky. Raising goats is not easy. Loss is so hard. With so much already going on..youbare making a decision beat for you and your husband and your goats. No harsh judgment here..i commend you for doing what is best for all. 

Best wishes


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## K Brooke (May 9, 2018)

I’m so sorry for your struggles! It’s definitely frustrating when you feel like nothing is going right and you can’t figure out why. I just sold almost all of my herd due to severe worm issues. I just couldn’t get my goats to be as healthy as I wanted them so I sold over half and only have three left. It difficult but I think it’s very wise. :hug: 
Maybe you can take a break for now and get just a few in the future. This a great place to gain lots of knowledge!


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## R.Williamson (Mar 21, 2019)

Actually, I give you mad credit for stepping away. Far too often people refuse to see that they are not capable. Not a judgement against them just facts. I know I only have so many years left to b working with my goats before I am unable to. It speaks to you as a person for being willing to step back and move them to a new home.It's never an easy decision.


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## Sfgwife (Feb 18, 2018)

CaramelKittey said:


> I'm sorry to hear that. It has happened to all of us, and sometimes there just isn't much we can do. I hope you find great homes for your goats.
> @Sfgwife Are you out in that area?
> Do you know anybody?


I do not know anyone looking for a herd right now. :/.


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## Davi (Apr 9, 2019)

Its a good thing to admit when you cant manage something and to cut back. Running yourself into the ground isn't good for anyone. Give your goats lots of cuddles and wish them the best, I hope with less stress you find your life happier and healthier!


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## Duchesse (Oct 31, 2007)

:wow: :ty::bighug: That's why I love TGS. I was worried that I'd be seen in a bad light but everyone has been supportive. Now I have to get busy finding them a good home.:coolmoves:

I'll keep you posted.


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## CaramelKittey (Oct 31, 2019)

Duchesse said:


> :wow: :ty::bighug: That's why I love TGS. I was worried that I'd be seen in a bad light but everyone has been supportive. Now I have to get busy finding them a good home.:coolmoves:
> 
> I'll keep you posted.


:hug:


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## Tanya (Mar 31, 2020)

Duchesse. No judgement from any one. If they do judge they dont belong here. You must do what is best for your herd and for you. I am sorry you had these losses and I am sorry things have been so difficult. Your herd will be fine. You know who you want to take them. Love from this side of the world.


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## toth boer goats (Jul 20, 2008)

:squish:


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## Goats Rock (Jun 20, 2011)

It's a wise person that knows their own limitations. No one has the right to judge you, especially when you are doing the best you can. I'm sure it will be a feeling of relief (and sadness, too) to find good homes for your herd. Best wishes for all good things to come your way!


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## MadHouse (Oct 3, 2019)

I agree with everyone and think TGS is a very special group of people. Kind and supportive!
:bighug:
Good luck selling the herd!


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## Jessica84 (Oct 27, 2011)

No I agree with the others, it takes a strong person to look past their love and want of animals and look at what is best for them instead. That is a SUPER tough call. Also sadly we don’t know when we are at our limit until we end up in shoes like yours or just about kill our selfs before we realize it’s just not going ok any more. 
I am so very sorry you have had all this on your plate, and I’m also sorry you have had to make this tough call.


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## toth boer goats (Jul 20, 2008)

I so agree.


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## Duchesse (Oct 31, 2007)

:update: I found someone who is interested in buying my herd but now I'm having second thoughts (headsmash). I still have some time to think about it. I'm confused:shrug:. One minute I think it's the right thing to do and the next I remember how long it took to get them. How I carefully picked them. I have to(pray) on this. My sister said don't sell them. My husband says it's up to me. I think secretly he would be happy to see them go.

I just wish I knew what went wrong.mg: What did I do?ops2: Should I have given dewormer when she had those soft stools. I ascribe to the natural methods so pumpkins seeds was all she had been given in her morning grain. I didn't get the herbs or EO for deworming:bonk:. I also don't think we changed their bedding often enough. Also I don't think I kept things clean enough. Some folks clean up the poop. We didn't. We covered it with wood shavings and periodically used barn lime. Could that be it? I feel like a failure.


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## Jessica84 (Oct 27, 2011)

This is something that only you can figure out :hugs: I have to tell you though I have KINDA been in your shoes. I’ve had gotten to the point I just couldn’t have as many head as I did. I didn’t have to sell every single on and I didn’t want to I just needed less and had to make some VERY hard choices. Every time I wrote a name down I would cross it off, I would add it again or replace with someone else. Finally I had to just look at it as what was best for them and me. Hanging onto the ones that were not pulling their weight like the others just had to go. A lot of them were pets but it wasn’t fair to any of us. I can tell you loading them in the trailer just about made me sick. I almost opened the gate and turned them back out. I didn’t, I went threw with it and it really wasn’t that long until it was like this giant weight had been lifted off my chest. I had more time to keep up on the others, no one was being even semi neglected, I could really keep a eye on everything and not have something sneak up. 
I’m not trying to talk you into selling. Like I said only you know what is up and what you can and can’t handle, I’m just telling you that I know what your looking at and feeling. If you choose to go threw with it, it does get better :hugs:


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## toth boer goats (Jul 20, 2008)

:nod::up:


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## Duchesse (Oct 31, 2007)

:update: 
:ty: (grouphug) I get it. I know that selling the herd is best for all involved. I didn't tell everyone that I also have limited use of one of my arms( a chronic muscle strain). I bit off more than I could chew.:hubbahubba:
I was trying to fulfill my bucket list since I had a massive heart attack. I felt like :dreams:. I've always been like that. :imsorry: I shouldn't have done that. I created a mess.(headsmash) I feel terrible:upset: Thanks for listening and all your input. I needed this support.

I hope you don't get tired of me. I might need to vent until they are picked up. I might also still need some advice. I don't want to lose another goatmg:.:imok:


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## Tanya (Mar 31, 2020)

Duchesse, you are not judged nor a person this forum will be tired of. I asked silly questions all the time. Keep on it. Dont worry too much.


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## CaramelKittey (Oct 31, 2019)

Tanya said:


> Duchesse, you are not judged nor a person this forum will be tired of. I asked silly questions all the time. Keep on it. Dont worry too much.


x2
I ask ridiculous questions on a daily basis. We all are/were beginners.


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## Jessica84 (Oct 27, 2011)

No way! This would be the HARDEST thing for any of us to have to do! So we totally get it.


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## toth boer goats (Jul 20, 2008)

We all understand, believe me.
No worries. :hug:


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## SalteyLove (Jun 18, 2011)

Did the potential buyer come see the herd yet?


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## Duchesse (Oct 31, 2007)

SalteyLove said:


> Did the potential buyer come see the herd yet?


No she hasn't but we have sent her pics. I'm computer illiterate so I can't post pics without help. I have a beautiful herd.


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## K's boys (May 7, 2020)

I'm so sorry to read that you lost your baby, (hugs) no one can know the pain you're going through unless they've walked in your shoes, please dont think that anyone will be judging you as you need to do what's best for you! As a newbie (soon to get my wethers) I've learned a lot of information from this site and I'm hoping that you as an experienced goat owner would apply your knowledge and advice when you feel up to it.


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## Duchesse (Oct 31, 2007)

:update: 

 It seems I'm not done yet. After doing some :reading: some(punch) and some soul searching. Hubby and I have decided to keep our herd.:nod: We worked too hard to get them.

What I did do was, I've stepped up my game. My goats are in confinement which poses a special challenge other than just feeding. :upset: Cleanliness is extremely important. Also keeping them out of that hay feeder ( this is what I believe killed my baby Winky.)

For the two ( Hershey and her 5 week old doeling Glee) in a (5ft x 15ft dog kennel with a large dog house for shelter) I change their ACV and water 2x a day, I clean the stall daily. (shy) I also intend to sell Glee when she is weaned.

For the four in the large enclosed pen( 11ft x 25ft), weekly cleaning (removal of poopmg, barn lime, and shavings. Also ACV in water twice a day.

I feed Purina goat feed mixed with alfalfa pellets, BOSS, fresh garlic and pumpkin seeds. I also give Hay and minerals free choice.

Keeping goats in confinement is a special challenge.:upset: We are hoping to expand but until then, are there any more suggestions?:shrug:


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## 21goaties (Mar 13, 2018)

Can you post pics of your setup?


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## Nigerian dwarf goat (Sep 25, 2017)

Yes, we can help you make the most of your setup, if we see what we are working with


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## SalteyLove (Jun 18, 2011)

How long have they been living in those enclosures and how much longer will it take to expand? That is very limited space for goats to live. 

ACV is a lovely but it's not going to solve any health issues.


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## Duchesse (Oct 31, 2007)

SalteyLove said:


> How long have they been living in those enclosures and how much longer will it take to expand? That is very limited space for goats to live.
> 
> ACV is a lovely but it's not going to solve any health issues.


They have been living in these fenced enclosures for a year. I'm going to get my son to help me get some pics on.

ACV helps them to drink more water. The ACV also helps deter bugs and bacteria in the water. I change the water 2x a day for cleanliness. ACV also helps prevent urinary calculi (kidney stones) in the male. All of which I think will help with health.


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## Duchesse (Oct 31, 2007)

:update:
This happens the minute that I decided to keep them, (embarrassed) , Yup.:nod: So what am I going to do?:shrug:

I'm going through with the sale.:nod: I :inlove: them too much to not give them this chance at a good life. This is the right thing to do. (dance)

The buyers were looking for a small herd. They have 3 acres and two young children. They sent pics of the barn/shelter and the pasture. They're purchasing all six goats, the two stanchions and some other supplies. This is hard :upset: but necessary. :imsorry:Things didn't work out. I guess it's not in the cards for me. Granny has to stf down now.(rofl)
:heehee:
At least I did :dreams: That's :usa2:.

They'll be picking them up on Saturday morning. I'll keep you posted.:neat:


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## goatblessings (Jan 6, 2015)

Really a good choice for you and your herd. Even though its hard,,,, probably the best thing for you and them.


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## NDinKY (Aug 3, 2019)

Congrats on finding them a great home! 

It would be very difficult to maintain the setup you described having, so it sounds like you’re making the best choice.


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## 21goaties (Mar 13, 2018)

Sounds like a good home, glad they get a pasture! Tell the buyers to join The Goat Spot!   Did they say if they've had goats before?


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## ksalvagno (Oct 6, 2009)

That is great that they are going to a good home. You can feel good about it. You have to be honest with yourself and do what is best for you and the goats.


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## toth boer goats (Jul 20, 2008)

(thumbup)


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## wndngrvr (Dec 10, 2011)

It is hard to make decisions like you are doing = I should be doing it also. I have 20 Nigerian does, 2 bucks and we have a few sheep and chickens. Getting too old for all the work but try hard to keep up. Do you have a vet that would work with you and help you some. I have a wonderful vet clinic that has helped me with so many things over the years. Did you get fecals done? 
Personally - I tried the organic solutions for awhile but never helped me any. Also bought a ram lamb from a lady that used the organic ways and the company you previously mentioned. It was so overloaded with parasites and even with several times the vet trying we lost him. Depending on where we live may affect the parasite problem. Good luck with your decision.


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## Duchesse (Oct 31, 2007)

:update:

Everything went:great:. The buyer and her husband rented a medium sized cattle trailer and picked up everything. I'm so happy(dance). They both are young, strong, they love animals and the wife was raised on a dairy farm with 300 cows:cow:.:wow:I couldn't have asked for a better buyer.:dreams: She sent pics when they got home. Everyone is settled in. The children are ecstatic along with her.:neat: I told her about TGS and encouraged her to come here and learn more about goat care. I feel great:clapping:. This was the right decision for me.

I want to:ty: all:bighug: for being there for me. You all were so supportive, understanding and without judgement that it made my decision easier. Initially I felt like a failure. All my life I've been a tough cookie, I don't normally give up but alas I had to be honest with myself about my ability to care for them properly.:clever:


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## ksalvagno (Oct 6, 2009)

Sounds like a great ending. Glad the herd went together.


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## SalteyLove (Jun 18, 2011)

What a wonderful sale. I hope you feel an enormous sense of relief and less stress.


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## Angel A (Apr 4, 2020)

Duchesse said:


> :update:
> I Initially I felt like a failure. All my life I've been a tough cookie, I don't normally give up but alas I had to be honest with myself about my ability to care for them properly.:clever:


Well in my book, you're still one tough cookie. Can't imagine having to sell your entire herd.
You are surely not a failure. Given the fact that you recognize the needs of your herd and put their quality of life before your feelings, makes you pretty darn amazing


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## mariarose (Oct 23, 2014)

I'm so glad you feel great about this sale. If on some days you feel sad, regretful, that's OK. That doesn't mean you made the wrong decision. It means you miss them. It means you are sorry that some didn't make it.

I still cry sometimes. Karen told me I would and I didn't believe her. But she was right. I miss the herd, and I feel the guilt about the suffering I caused that forced my decision (in the end)

IMO, the South East is just not the place to depend upon pumpkin seeds. Pumpkin seeds mean well and try their best, but...

The new family would be very, very welcome here. I know this was an excellent move for all around. Great job.


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## Makenna (Aug 16, 2019)

Duchesse said:


> I am *DONE*. Winky, my 3 month old doe died. It is time for me to face some HARSH realities. *I am* not able to do this anymore. Winky's death speaks to MY management. I thought I only needed help from my husband but, in reality he's getting help from me.He already has his hands full. We also raise toy poodles. I have 7 dogs. We are both up in age me 57yo with a heart condition and him 66yo with hypertension (high blood pressure). So I now see that we are not able and most of the work was falling on him and these are my goats.
> 
> SO, I've decided to disperse my whole herd. It's only 6 goats now. 4 does, 1 buck, and 1 wether. I've decided to do this for them. Obviously something is very wrong. I've lost 4 goats in less than 6 months. First JoJo died. Hannah lost a buckling because she was too young to get pregnant. Bonnie had two kids and the buck died within 24 hours. I bottle fed Winky for 10 weeks and now she's gone. Again this speaks to *MY* management. So it is time to seek a good home for them.
> 
> I hope that no one judges me to harshly.:imsorry: I really did try. I feel absolutely terrible.:upset: I want to :hide: I'm (embarrassed). I thought I could handle this but I'm not able anymore. I :inlove: my animals to much to see them suffer. This is the right thing to do.:nod:


Don't worry about it because you're doing the right thing. You want your goats to have the best lives and that's what you're doing. Don't be so hard on yourself


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## toth boer goats (Jul 20, 2008)

:nod::up:


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## R.Williamson (Mar 21, 2019)

Congratulations! You did well.


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## Duchesse (Oct 31, 2007)

SalteyLove said:


> What a wonderful sale. I hope you feel an enormous sense of relief and less stress.


It was a wonderful sale!!(woot) I feel a huge sense of relief. She sent more pics and everyone is fine. They are just "chillin" on beautiful pasture. They finally have the kind of home that I wanted for them.(dance)


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## Duchesse (Oct 31, 2007)

R.Williamson said:


> Congratulations! You did well.


:ty:


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## Duchesse (Oct 31, 2007)

Makenna said:


> Don't worry about it because you're doing the right thing. You want your goats to have the best lives and that's what you're doing. Don't be so hard on yourself


:ty:


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## Duchesse (Oct 31, 2007)

mariarose said:


> I'm so glad you feel great about this sale. If on some days you feel sad, regretful, that's OK. That doesn't mean you made the wrong decision. It means you miss them. It means you are sorry that some didn't make it.
> 
> I still cry sometimes. Karen told me I would and I didn't believe her. But she was right. I miss the herd, and I feel the guilt about the suffering I caused that forced my decision (in the end)
> 
> ...


:ty: for understanding. :squish:


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## Duchesse (Oct 31, 2007)

Angel A said:


> Well in my book, you're still one tough cookie. Can't imagine having to sell your entire herd.
> You are surely not a failure. Given the fact that you recognize the needs of your herd and put their quality of life before your feelings, makes you pretty darn amazing


:wowembarrassed) :ty: I don't know what to say(shy).


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## R.Williamson (Mar 21, 2019)

I love it when I see them in a great home!


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## toth boer goats (Jul 20, 2008)

:coolmoves::great:


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## Tanya (Mar 31, 2020)

:bighug::goodjobhighfive)
Your herd will thrive knowing you did the best for them. Well done Duchesse. You are such an admirable person. My respect for you and every one here has trippled.


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## Angel A (Apr 4, 2020)

Duchesse said:


> :wowembarrassed) :ty: I don't know what to say(shy).


:squish:


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