# Not good at saying I can't or no.



## bisonviewfarm (Apr 2, 2015)

Feeling like a rather cruddy person. Currently ignoring messages & calls from my neighbor about her dog delivering puppys. It sounds like a perfectly normal delivery ( if it didn't I'd have been over there) but she calls me for everything. I've delivered baby goats bottle fed baby's for most of their lives, spent a day saving a buck ,I've done meds and hoof trimmings. Not to mention check ups during pregnancy & several trips to check on the baby's during the time she had them and advice on the dogs and goats ( I warned her to keep said dog away from the males for 3 weeks atleast). They are wonderful people and awesome neighbors but dang it I just can't drop everything in my life every time they have an animal emergency. And now of course I get to feel like crap all day for not rushing over once again :shrug:


----------



## Iluvlilly! (Apr 6, 2019)

I'm so sorry that you are going through this:hug: I hope everything goes well


----------



## Nigerian dwarf goat (Sep 25, 2017)

I'm sorry. Sometimes, people just need to do things their self, and they need to understand that you have a life too. At least they are getting info from a knowledgeable person!


----------



## bisonviewfarm (Apr 2, 2015)

Thanks guys feeling a bit better about my choice! No more calls or texts so I suspect the delivery is going fine. She has a tendency to freak out over everything she's a great person but not great at farm or animal related stuff.


----------



## MadHouse (Oct 3, 2019)

Sometimes we have to be forced to do something on our own, and find out, we can do it (I mean your neighbor).


----------



## goatblessings (Jan 6, 2015)

Some folks, as nice as they are, need to be weaned from relying on you so much. If they plan to keep having livestock and puppies, the more they do it on their own, the more self reliant they can be. Start by just not having your phone on, etc..... they do need to do more themselves after such good instruction.


----------



## bisonviewfarm (Apr 2, 2015)

Thanks guys!
Thankfully her males now fixed and female will be in 6 weeks so no more puppy's. Figured I'd do a checkup and everything seems to be fine she ended up calling the vet about an umbilical cord mom nipped to short but she made it through.


----------



## ReNat (Jan 20, 2019)

People have a unique opportunity to help others, in any form, even simple advice. 

I teach my children, if you do bad things, the bad things will multiply by three and come back to you, and for you to get one good thing back, you need to do three good things.


----------



## bisonviewfarm (Apr 2, 2015)

ReNat said:


> People have a unique opportunity to help others, in any form, even simple advice.
> 
> I teach my children, if you do bad things, the bad things will multiply by three and come back to you, and for you to get one good thing back, you need to do three good things.


That is usually the rule I follow which is probably why I felt so bad. Everything turned out fine and I went over and gave everyone a once over tonight. Hoping it helped give her a little more confidence in her ability to handle things like this


----------



## ksalvagno (Oct 6, 2009)

Your family and farm come first. Some people take advantage. I don't blame you for not answering. Even if things are going on, you shouldn't be the one constantly helping. She needs to utilize her vet. Glad things went well.


----------



## ReNat (Jan 20, 2019)

Recently, I removed a goat with my own hands, which was injured by a dog. I watched the video on how to act, he prepared a place, and it worked for me. I'm even grateful to those who refused to help me when I asked. Now I have experience and skill.


----------



## Trollmor (Aug 19, 2011)

goatblessings said:


> Some folks, as nice as they are, need to be *weaned from relying on you* so much.


:funnytech: Just on the spot!


ReNat said:


> ... for you to get one good thing back, you need to do three good things.





bisonviewfarm said:


> That is usually the rule I follow


Maybe you did more than three? Can it help you to think that you help your nice neighbour best by making their self confidence grow a bit?


ReNat said:


> Recently, I *removed* a goat with my own hands.


This word I do not understand.


----------



## Goats Rock (Jun 20, 2011)

Removed a goat, it looks like he may have euthanized it? Or removed it from danger? I'm not sure, either.

Good for you not dropping everything and running over. It's great to help folks, but sometimes they take it to the extreme. Don't feel guilty. If it had been a true life or death emergency, they would have physically come and got you!


----------



## ReNat (Jan 20, 2019)

Trollmor said:


> This word I do not understand.


The slaughter of goat.


----------



## groovyoldlady (Jul 21, 2011)

When I sell goats, I may a point of offering to TEACH the new owners skills. ie. I will teach THEM how to trim hooves, give shots, disbud, etc. But if I am asked to DO the care, they need to pay me.

Of course, there are emergencies or special situations that warrant freely given kindness. But my little plan does help prevent people leaning on me TOO much!


----------



## toth boer goats (Jul 20, 2008)

You did good, we can't always be there for others, we have our own life and issues to deal with.

I highly commend you for helping others, but to be taken advantage of at all times, is just not fair to anyone.


----------



## bisonviewfarm (Apr 2, 2015)

Thanks guys! I feel pretty good about my choice now. I've got a pretty busy life between 3 kids their activities work and our own animals and projects so hours spent taking care of other people's stuff can be a little hard some times. It's nice to not feel awful for not doing it for once


----------



## SalteyLove (Jun 18, 2011)

I totally understand! I love sharing animal care knowledge and lending helping hands when possible. I don't mind the occasional 10pm birth call and I think sometimes it just takes some knowledge and can save you a Veterinary bill! But there is one couple who has begun to call fairly frequently and are not really heeding all my suggestions. Its even harder to say no to the humans when you feel like you could better an animals life.


----------



## Goats Rock (Jun 20, 2011)

People that ask your opinion then ignore it and end up losing a goat are very irksome!


----------



## toth boer goats (Jul 20, 2008)

(thumbup)


----------

