# City Slicker guide to hiking (or learning the hard way)



## Bob Jones (Aug 21, 2009)

This thread is a companion thread to *City Sllicker guide to goats (or learning the hard way).*

So you want to go on a hike. Get a map. Now the reason for getting a map is so that you can say that you know where you are and where you are going. This does not actually mean that you know either of those facts, but the map gives you permission to say so.

Put a mark on the spot that you wish to start and another mark on the spot you would like to stop. If your starting and ending points are the same place, this is called a loop hike. The advantage to loop hikes is that while the rest of your party is out hiking, climbing, getting dirty and sweating, you can sit their at the start/stop location drinking margeritas until they arrive at the destination, where you can join them for the post hike celebrations. It also has the advantage that you don't have to shuffle vehicles to pick up hikers at a different location, particularly since you have been drinking margaritas.

If the start and stop points are different locations, then you have a bit more planning to do. Check to see if the start point is close to a road. If not, you will have to plan another hike to get there. You may be tempted to plan that hike at a different time of year, but it is very critical that you plan it to end just about the time your first hike hike is supposed to begin. It does get a bit confusing since your first hike actually takes place second. A similar problem can occur if your stop point is not close to a road, since you will then have to plan another hike to get back to a road from your stop point. When it is possible, try to have your start and stop points close to roads.

For example, I planned a hike from Wall Lake, which is not close to a road to Whitney reservoir, which is close to a road. So I only had to plan two hikes instead of three since I wisely chose Whitney reservoir as the end point.

Look at how many lines on the map you have to cross to get from the start point to the end point. This is important. The number of lines you have to cross tells you how much you have to climb or descend on your route. Of course whether you are climbing or descending depends on the direction that you cross the lines. Since I like to go downhill more than I like climbing, I make many short hikes all going downhill. That's right, it can be done. Just start each section of the hike from the top of a ridge or mountain, and plan to go downhill as far as you can. All the short hikes don't usually connect, so you have to plan another set of hike to connect them. Here's the cool part. Since I want to go downhill the whole way, I just reverse the direction on the connecting hikes so that they all go downhill as well.

If the lines are really close together, it means you can make really good time going downhill there. They also make good launching points if hang gliding is planned into your hike.

Back to choosing your start and stop points: You may occasionally find out that you cannot get from your start point to your stop point. In these cases, just go somewhere else first. Be careful not to let the others in your party know that you cannot get there from here, or they may tell you to go somewhere else first.


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## TDG-Farms (Jul 12, 2013)

and here i thought you just started walking and you were hiking... boy do I have a ton to learn!


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## Bob Jones (Aug 21, 2009)

The difference between hiking and walking is the same difference as between a custodian and a janitor. The hiker has something analogous to a career goal. 

Once you have your map, be sure to give it to someone so that if you don't return on time, you will know where they are looking for you. If you go to that area they may find you.


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## Nanno (Aug 30, 2009)

I thought the purpose of giving your map to someone else was so they could eliminate one of the possibilities of where to look for you.


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## Bob Jones (Aug 21, 2009)

They always seem to find people in the place they least expect to find them. So I always head up the search party to Las Vegas. ;-)


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## Bob Jones (Aug 21, 2009)

Once you have your route planned out on the map you should check to see if there are any trails nearby. If you have trails nearby, you don't have to travel to the distant wilderness and trek through the path that you have charted.

If there are trails close to the path you have charted be careful to avoid them. Rangers are always concerned about horses and people damaging trails.

As you are happily trekking through the wilderness, you are now following in the footsteps of the famous explorers Lewis and Clark. Although in reality they left very few footsteps having traveled much of their journey by boat. These two famous Coast-Guardsmen, (having claimed jurisdiction over navigable waters of the US) were the nucleus around which the Army Corp of Discovery was formed.

It is recorded that Lewis and Clark had established relations with two dozen indigenous nations. I am not quite sure why they are credited with discovery if they already had established relations. While you are hiking, if you come across established relations, I don't think you can claim the right of discovery.

"Hey, here's my brother-in-law. I think I'll plant a flag."

Here's a picture of one of their campsites in North Dakota.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:001_Fort_Mandan_Interior.jpg

Hopefully your camping equipment is a bit lighter.


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## Nanno (Aug 30, 2009)

Ooh... I like that campsite. That's the kind of tent I need! I think I need more goats to pack it in though. Cuzco is pretty awesome and all, but I'm not sure he could quite handle that load by himself. Do you think the "leave no trace" people would have a fit? 

Why do we work so hard to preserve the final remnants left by people from previous centuries, yet it is seriously frowned upon for us to leave traces for our descendants to know us by? Eventually people are going to think they had no ancestors and that they were hatched from pods because we'll have left no "footprints". And why is garbage from another century or another culture considered relics worthy of display in a museum, but my litter is a stain on the face of mother nature? All those Indians who left broken pottery and arrowheads scattered around their camps and who abandoned their adobe huts in the cliffs instead of dismantling them and scattering the bricks ought to be ashamed of themselves. Perhaps we should fine their descendants for trashing this beautiful country before White Man even set foot on it.


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## Nanno (Aug 30, 2009)

By the way, Bob have you ever read the Pat McManus stories? I think you'd like them. This story contains some expert advice on getting lost: 
http://books.google.com/books?id=SIwt-SlBYAkC&pg=PA14&lpg=PA14#v=onepage&q&f=false


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## Bob Jones (Aug 21, 2009)

Nanno said:


> By the way, Bob have you ever read the Pat McManus stories? I think you'd like them. This story contains some expert advice on getting lost:
> http://books.google.com/books?id=SIwt-SlBYAkC&pg=PA14&lpg=PA14#v=onepage&q&f=false


He's funny.


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